Holding It In
by BleachBurns
Summary: Beast Boy drinks to keep from breaking. Raven wants to help, but will she make it worse? And what does Raven see in BB's head that has her so shaken?
1. Holding It In

Disclaimer- Does anyone believe I own this?

Ages- Beast Boy, Rave, Starfire- 17, Robin- 18, Cyborg- 19

This is my first Teen Titans fanfiction, I hope you enjoy.

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The night was cold and the streets were quiet. Beast Boy pulled his arms around his body in an attempt to find more warmth as he continued his trek down the foreboding streets of Jump City. It was nearing the middle of October and the weather had just started to turn sour. Every surface within sight was brushed with a thin layer of new frost. The streets and sidewalks glistened and sparkled under the glow of the streetlights guiding Beast Boy's way.

His breath rolled out of his mouth like the smoke of a cigar, rising up and melting into the sky. Out at night, alone like this, he would never change into a bird or a bug or any other kind of winged beast. True, flying was incredible, but walking the darkened streets, the sound of heavy traffic from the highway in the distance piercing what would be a quiet night, crooks and bums leering out at him, prostitutes winking and beckoning him closer, somehow made him feel… important, maybe even strong or brave. He didn't have to be out here among all this, but he chose to be. He liked to think that someone might gasp and say, "You were outside at night? By yourself!" And he could shrug and tell them, "yeah, no big deal."

It was near midnight and there were no more than a handful of people out on the streets, but Beast Boy was starting to get that feeling again, like someone might be watching him. The scratching at the back of his brain that was telling him to beware, be on guard, had translated itself into physical feelings and the hair on the back of his neck stood on end and his skin began to feel hot and tingly. On the very edge of his vision he spotted a smudged shape move quickly and disappear. He didn't bother to look, he knew that it wouldn't be there anymore when he did. "Okay, calm down," he told himself, "you're just imagining things. There is no incredibly ferocious monster after your blood following you." His eyes went wide at the thought of the monster and he wished to hell he hadn't just said that.

An involuntary shiver ran down our green friend's spine as he pushed a lock of emerald hair out of his eyes. Much had changed in the years following Terra's incarceration in stone. All of the Titans had changed in some way, and Beast Boy was no exception. He had grown nearly half a foot, a fact he made sure to point out to everyone (although, how could they have missed it?). He had filled out some and was no longer skinny, but instead gave off a lean, muscular look. His facial features had changed from boyishly cute to, well, a more mature cuteness. He had allowed his hair to grow out to just over his ears, and used it almost like a security blanket, covering his eyes with his bangs when embarrassed, ashamed, or scared, and pushing the tendrils out of the way when he felt confident or brave. His attitude and behavior had changed very little. He was still the laid back and care free member of the team, but he had even matured in these aspects of his life as well. His jokes were more though out, witty, and sometimes, to Raven's chagrin, more sarcastic. He had become a more thoughtful person, perhaps even a little more reserved, but was basically the same old Beast Boy. His voice had changed only slightly, deepening somewhat, but still had a grating edge to it that seemed to get on some people's nerves after long exposure, and Beast Boy was thankful that the Titans had gotten used to it over the years. He had grown out of his Doom Patrol costume long ago and had switched to a more updated version. This one was similar but was completely sleeveless, and the color scheme was black and blue.

Beast Boy was, at the moment, out of uniform. He was dressed as a civilian in jeans, a band t-shirt, a black hooded sweatshirt to conceal his face, and sneakers, and had wrapped himself in a dark jacket that seemed to be doing a good job at keeping out the biting cold.

"Spare some change?" A voice croaked out to Beast Boy's right. He turned slowly and was met with a pair of dead, grey eyes. Eyes like fish. They belonged to a man wrapped in a thick blanket. Though it was hard to tell through the fabric, he looked emaciated and near death. His white hair puffed like a corona about his head, and his hand, bare and shaking, reached out to Beast Boy.

"Uh, yeah, sure." Beast Boy quickly went through his pockets and found a handful of change. It was mostly pennies, but there was some more valuable currency mixed in. He showered the metal into the old man's quaking hand and watched a smile rip across his wrinkled face.

"You are an angel, sir," the old man nodded to Beast Boy, joyous with the small offering of pocket change. Beast Boy bowed his head low and smiled a bit.

"I don't know about that," he said, turning from the man, "every day I feel more like a devil." And he did. He could feel it, down inside him, threatening to tear up out of him and destroy what he had made for himself. The Beast. That's what it was called, and truly what it was. It no longer seemed content to sit at the very bottom of the teen's being. It seemed to want to burst forth and be known. It was the reason Beast Boy's feet were carrying him where they were.

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"I'm gonna need to see some I.D., sir." The doorman at The Black Bird Bar (the owners seemed to have thing for alliteration) was a hulking man, threatening in every way imaginable. He was as big wide as he was tall, and damn was he tall. His mouth was twisted into a frown and his eyes seemed to pierce straight through one's soul.

"It's me, Mike." Beast Boy tilted his head up and let the light above the doorman's head flood into his hood. Instantly Mike's expression softened.

"You're back again, Mr. Logan?" He asked. He shook his head sadly and his voice softened even more, picking up and holding onto a sad edge that seemed to give his speech a hesitance. "You were here just two nights ago. These visits seem to be getting more and more frequent."

"Yeah, so?" Beast Boy asked angrily, but still keeping his voice low. "This is just something I need, okay? And I told you, my name is Garfield." Mike stared straight into Beast Boy's eyes and the Titan felt his insides mashing up as he forced himself to stare right back. Beast Boy had gotten to know Mike after the teen had saved him from a falling piece of building some time ago in one the Titan's many battles. It seems that a guy will do nearly anything for you once you have kept them from dying, and Beast Boy used that to his advantage when he found out that the man was a bouncer at this bar.

The long silence between the two continued to grow bigger and bigger. Finally Beast Boy spoke, "are you going to let me in, or am I going to have to find another bar?" Mike closed his eyes for a moment before sighing and opening the door.

"Go on in," he said, holding it open for Beast Boy, "just remember, I'll always be here if you need me."

"Thanks, Mike, I'll remember that," Beast Boy said, disappearing into the darkness of the bar, pulling his hood down farther to better hide his face.

The noise of the bar was wonderful. It was a mixture of people speaking and glasses clanging, and was backed by strange electronica music that was kept at a surprisingly low level for the time being (There seemed not to be any live entertainment tonight). The clamor around him was loud, but not too loud. It was a dull noise too, not a single word could be picked out of it. It was just a wave of sound that smashed into and rolled off Beast Boy's body. In a strange way it made him feel safe. He had always hated silence so much. It made him feel lonely, and his greatest fear was to be alone.

As he crossed the room toward the bar, he could feel eyes washing over him. His face was hidden under a hood, which only lent him an air of mysteriousness, but it was obvious he had a very nice body, and people couldn't help but stare. Beast Boy didn't really mind, but it did make him feel slightly uncomfortable. It also made him feel paranoid that maybe it was his green skin they were staring at, and he did his best to pull his hands, his only exposed flesh, further into the sleeves of his coat.

"What can I get for you, Sugar?" Rosalita was the bartender at The Black Bird Bar, and seemed to enjoy giving everyone the nickname of sugar, no matter their gender. Beast Boy sometimes suspected that she was just bad at remembering people. He had, on the very first night he came here, told her his name, and she had forgotten it on the next visit. How hard is it to remember a pointy eared, green skinned person anyway? He had not taken such precautions to cover up his identity on those first trips as he did now. It became too much of a hassle when people recognized him. All he wanted to do was be left alone, sit, and drink.

"Just bring me a bottle of whiskey and a shot glass," he said, pushing a wad of money across the bar. Rosalita nodded and left for a moment, returning with the requested items.

"Here you go, Sugar." She set the bottle of Jim Beam and the tiny glass down in front of him and, much to Beast Boy's dismay, did not leave. She placed her hands down on the bar in front of her and leaned forward, a smile thick with red, waxy lipstick stuck to her makeup splashed face. She really needed to go easier on the cosmetics, she had quite a pleasant face that only suffered when she drowned it in so much color. "What's the matter, Sugar?" She asked, "You seem kind of sad. Want to talk about it?"

"Not really." Beast Boy tilted the bottle of whiskey over and let the beautiful amber liquid pour into the shot glass that sat in front of him. He had been quite rude to Rosalita, but for some reason she still had not left. Normally there were many more people at the bar, and the girl was never able to sit and chat, but tonight she seemed to have some free time and it was just Beast Boy's luck that she would decide to spend it with him.

"Are you sure you don't have anything to say?" Rosalita pushed, lowering her head to try and get a better look at this stranger's face. Beast Boy said nothing, his hand tightening on the shot glass, but he had yet to take a drink. "Come on, Sugar, I'm a real good listener."

"Leave me alone NOW," Beast Boy erupted, his voice dripping with poison. Rosalita froze. She was suddenly able to see his face. His eyes were glowing with an intense hatred and his features seemed to be twisting into something quite beastly. The poor bartender gasped and pulled back. She ran to the restroom, ranting about hallucinations. Beast Boy's hand went to his face. 'I nearly changed into… it,' he thought, his face slowly going back to normal. 'I have to get this under control.' He looked down at his hand and saw that he had squeezed the shot glass hard enough to break it during his outburst. Thick drops of crimson blood trickled from between his fingers and onto the stained wood of the bar, pooling into an unidentifiable shape. "Shit," Beast Boy muttered. He let go of the broken glass and reached for the bottle of Jim Beam. Taking a deep breath, he brought the bottle to his lips and took a long swig. He cringed at the awful taste and let the fire trickle down his throat. After he swallowed he felt his face go completely back to the way it was supposed to be. The alcohol was drowning that thing down inside him, helping him keep his control. "Oh, God," he muttered at the feeling it left in his mouth, it was sterile and sharp. He took another deep breath, and it was followed by another trail of fire flowing down his throat, and then another, and another, drink after drink after drink.


	2. Walking Away

Thanks to the one person that reviewed, a handjob is coming your way. But seriously….

"….." is speech and '…..' is thoughts, just to be clear.

I'll try and update every three to four day. Enjoy.

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The world was melting into a mosaic of blurred color. It was a pointillist's masterpiece. It was a swirl of shades, an explosion of pigments, and a collage of varying hues.

"Fuck," Beast Boy mumbled. "I shouldn't… too much…" His sentences reflected his mental state. He brought his hands up to his face and planted his fingers into his eyes, trying to rub away the blurs. For a moment it worked and the bar he was in suddenly went back to the way it had been when he entered. It lasted only a moment though, and then went back to a smear of half recognized shapes.

His bladder was screaming at him to empty it immediately. Finally complying, he stood up for the first time in an hour and nearly fell onto his ass. He looked around to see if anyone had noticed, but everyone seemed to be involved in their own little worlds.

The bathroom was quite clean for one found in a bar, but Beast Boy hardly had the time to look at the scenery. He lumbered toward the urinal and unzipped, pulling his dick free from its cotton and denim prison. Yellow piss streamed down the side of the porcelain, a sort of strange waterfall. Beast Boy laughed at the idea of a piss waterfall, and in doing so only succeeded in getting pee on himself. He grumbled something indecipherable and, when completely finished, shook himself twice and shoved his friend back into his jeans.

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It was even colder outside now than it had been before, if that were possible. Mike the bouncer had gotten off quite some time ago and had entered the bar, trying to speak with Beast Boy, but the green teen brushed him off, more interested in his drink. The doorman now was a short fat man in his late twenties. His lip curled up away from his teeth in a strange permanent snarl. He eyed Beast Boy with disdain for a moment before turning away from him and becoming engrossed in his cell phone.

As Beast Boy made his way back to Titan's Tower, he continually mumbled a string of unconnected thoughts. He passed a missing dog poster and its cigarette burn eyes stared out at him, begging to be found. He slipped, tripped, and fell numerous times, scraping himself up all over his body. He had wrapped his hand, sliced up from the broken shot glass, in a bar towel, and the cold air and constant falling began to make it throb. It took him twice as long to get home as it had taken him to get to the bar, but finally the silhouette of Titan's Tower came into view.

Waves from the icy bay, more like dark ink than water, lapped at the shore in a white misted frenzy. Beast Boy planted his feet firmly in the sand and leaned forward, squinting toward the giant T-shaped tower several hundred yards away. It stuck out of the bay and rose up and up and up like a metal tooth extending from a liquid jaw. Green hands went up to a green face and massaged green temples for a few moments before a green mouth expelled a frustrated breath. "Here goes nothin'," he slurred, concentrating harder than he ever had before. His body began to twist and bend, slowly (Much slower than usual) morphing itself into an unidentifiable shape. It was some sort of bird, but at the same time wasn't. It was an abomination of sorts, not falling under any known species class. But it had wings, and that was all that BB needed.

After several rocky starts, Beast Boy finally managed to get himself airborne. He did not think of it at the time, but it was incredibly lucky that the gusts of wind that had plagued the city earlier had dissipated, for he would have surely been at their mercy. His flight path was erratic and unreasonable, but he eventually made it to shore. Landing in a heap, he sat for a moment on the sandy shores of Titan Island before standing and attempting to change back. He closed his eyes for a moment and willed himself to change. His eyes opened once more and he looked down at his body. Nothing had happened. He was the same. Again he tried changing and again he remained in the shape of that awful birdlike creature.

'Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit,' Beast Boy thought. The Titan began to panic. What was happening? Why couldn't he change back? He allowed his body to fall forward and come to a rest on the coarse sand particles of the beach. He allowed his eyes to close and the dizziness to run around in his head. He allowed his thoughts, lost in a pool of alcohol, to come together and start to make sense. Finally, he allowed himself to breathe. In. Out. In. Out. In. Out. His eyes opened slowly and he found that his original body had been returned. 'Oh thank God.'

He stumbled slowly toward the door to Titan's Tower. Spot lights the size of oil drums swept back and forth across the island, illuminating his path and keeping him from tripping over rocks sticking up out of the dirt like shark's teeth. He found the keypad that barred the door from being open by enemies and placed his hand upon its cool surface. There was a beep and a computerized voice said, "Welcome home, Beast Boy." The door slid open and the shape shifting Titan stepped inside.

The corridors through which he passed were dull and lifeless. Cold metal echoed back his careful footfalls. Images of carnage swam through Beast Boy's head as he staggered into the kitchen. Pulling open a cabinet, he found a glass and thrust it under the stream of water vomited by the kitchen sink. He tossed back his head and let the water slide down his throat, trying to clear his head of these half thought visions. "Get these fuckin' pictures out of my head," he mumbled, taking another drink, "I can barely even… I… I feel like I'm gonna puke." He tried to place the glass upon the counter, but in his inebriated state, he instead knocked it over and it rolled over the edge and shattered into a million shards upon the kitchen floor. He turned, cursing, to try and pick the pieces up when, out of the corner of his eye, he spotted something move. He glanced to his right and his eyes fell upon someone he did not want to see.

"Beast… wha…?" Raven's forehead wrinkled in confusion. She was dressed in her nightwear and held a steaming mug in her hand. Beast Boy stared at her for a moment before falling into a fit of laughter. He clamped his hand over his mouth. Up in his brain, amongst the fumes of inebriation, tiny bits of sense were making themselves known. 'She can't know!' His mind was screaming at him. 'Be cool!'

"Er… hey, Raven." Beast Boy willed himself to stand up his straightest and tried not to breathe too hard, his breath must have wreaked of whiskey. She saw him staring at the bandage he had wrapped around his hand and placed it behind his back. "How are you going-" He slapped himself on the head, "I mean, how are you doing?" Yeah, that sounded good. Not too slurred, not too rushed.

Raven's mouth fell open and she seemed to be searching for exactly what she wanted to say. Her eyes were searching for Beast Boy's, but he would not allow her to find them, instead letting them fall to the ground, contemplating his shoelaces. "Beast Boy, are you…?" She didn't seem to want to finish it. BB had never seen Raven at a loss for words. He didn't know why, but it left an empty feeling in his stomach.

"I think I'm going to go to, um, go to, uh, sleep," Beast Boy said, pointing toward his room, but Raven's gaze held him where he was. She regained her strength and once again posed the question.

"Are you fucking drunk?" It flew past her teeth and slapped Beast Boy in the face.

"What!" He wanted to sound shocked, but ended up sounding stupid. "Of Course not!" He denied the accusation as vehemently as if he had been called a rapist. Despite this though, he knew he'd been caught, and allowed his posture to change, his shoulders slumping forward, arms going slack at his sides. He still refused to let his eyes meet Raven's, now smoldering with the fires of rage, pity, hurt, and sympathy.

"Yes, you are," her voice was softer than before, but still hid a punch among the words.

"Yeah," Beast Boy finally agreed, barely above a whisper, "I am." There was a pause between the two. When she failed to speak at all, Beast Boy's eyes slowly, very slowly, crept up Raven's body and finally came to rest on her face. "I…." It was much too hard to think of something to say.

"Is this a one time thing?" She finally said something, but Beast Boy was so caught up in the terrible feeling the silence left him with, that he had not heard what Raven had said.

"Huh?" God he sounded so stupid.

"Is this a one time thing?" She asked again, "cause if it is, it's not really that big of a deal, but if this is something you do a lot, then we have a problem." She took a step closer and Beast Boy kept himself from stepping back. "I know this isn't the only time you've snuck out at night, but I want to know if this is how you always are when you come back."

"Raven?" Beast Boy closed his eyes and put his hands on his face. "Can we please not talk about this now, I'm so fucking wasted and… I really don't think I can stay awake much longer." He spoke slowly so as not to slur his words and to be as clear as possible. Raven looked like she was having some kind of internal battle, trying to figure out what to do.

"Fine," she said finally, "but we _will_ talk about this." Beast Boy nodded and stepped around Raven, trying not to trip as he stalked toward his room. When he finally made it to his chamber, he peeled off his dirty, grime streaked clothes and collapsed onto his bed, falling asleep with the room spinning around him.


	3. Having The Talk

Okay, I think people are a bit confused about my intentions for this story. I probably just haven't been very clear in my writing. Beast Boy isn't technically an alcoholic. True, he is dependant on the alcohol, but... just wait, you'll see. All will be cleared up in the next chapter, and things will start to move along much faster.

Also, I would just like to say that this story may or may not end up as a slash, I don't really know yet.

And finally, thank you for all the positive reviews.

Enjoy the story.

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"Ugh." Beast Boy's nose wrinkled and his lip curled back. "What is that awful smell?" he mumbled, still very much asleep. In an attempt to stave off the invading scent, he switched from breathing through his nose to breathing through his mouth. It really wasn't much better, instead of a horrible scent, he was met with a terrible hot moistness that fell into his mouth and left a bitter tang upon his tongue. His eyes broke open at the sheer annoyance of it all, and he was now fully awake. He found himself to be on his stomach, his face buried deep under his armpit. "Jesus Christ," he said, pushing himself up, "I fucking wreak!"

His bed sheets were twisted up with sweat and molded around his body. Sometime during the night, through some magical force, he had knocked half the items off his nightstand, the mattress had slid to a spot where it was precariously hanging, inches from falling to the ground, his pillows had been tossed across the room, and his boxers had been pushed halfway off his ass.

"Did all this happen during the night?" he asked himself aloud, "or did something happen that I don't remember?" Beast Boy was able to untangle his upper body from the sheets and sit cross legged in the center of his bed. A dull, pulsing pain was making itself known as it began to ripple through his head and then down to his hand. Glancing toward his palm, he saw that it was wrapped in a dirty bandage tinged with red blood. "How the hell did I cut myself?" 

He sat there for a moment like a school child waiting for the teacher to read a story, trying to think about the events leading up to him in a completely destroyed bed, a cut on his hand. "Hmmm." He put his hand to his chin for a moment. "Hey!" He suddenly straightened up his posture and smeared a smile across his face. "Maybe I got laid!" He looked around trying to find where the lucky girl might be. He leaned forward and peered under his bed, emerald hair, greasy and dull, hung down around his face like stringy seaweed. A stack of dirty magazines and a towel he called Veronica were piled together at the spot where his bed met the wall. A single sock sat alone at the end of the bed parallel to them, but there was no person to be found. "I guess not," he said, pulling himself back up into a sitting position. After a moment he solved the puzzle of freeing his legs from his sheets and pushed himself off his bed, grabbed some clothes, and headed to the shower.

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"I got some bacon, and some sausage, and some ham." Cyborg leaned over his plate of breakfast, his teeth and gums acting like a dam, holding back the saliva that was so close to spilling forth.

"You do indeed have many animals upon your plate," Starfire agreed cheerily. She herself sat in front of a steaming bowl of oatmeal, her hand clutching a bottle of mustard, ready to rain it open her cereal.

"Wait, wait, wait," Cyborg said, gesturing back to his plate, "I also got some eggs; sunny side up, over easy, and scrambled. Then there are the sweet, sweet pancakes with just a touch of maple syrup." His saliva now ran unabashedly down his chin. Starfire stared for a moment, mustard gushing forth and pooling on the top of her oatmeal.

"Er, yes," she nodded enthusiastically, "that is very nice, Cyborg."

"How can you stand to eat all that?" Raven asked, disgusted. She brought her mug of tea to her lips and let the warm liquid, sweetened slightly with a glob of honey, gush past her teeth and slide gently down her throat. After a moment she picked up a piece of toast and bit into it, hoping to settle the queasiness that had built up in her stomach in the past eight hours, ever since she had seen Beast Boy in the kitchen, drunk off his ass.

"Mmmm…" Cyborg said, biting through a thick sausage, its clear juices running down his face.

"I think I'm gonna be sick," Raven said, placing a hand over her mouth, "that is totally and infinitely disgusting."

"Raven?" Starfire asked, "Why are you in such a mood?" The alien girl spooned a helping of mustard laden oatmeal into her mouth, allowing the tangy soup to dance across her tongue and send signals of pleasure straight up to her brain. Raven frowned for a moment before her expression softened.

"I'm sorry, guys," she apologized. "It's just that I'm really worried about Beast-" her eyes went wide. She didn't mean for that to blurt out, she needed to talk to Beast Boy first before she jumped to any conclusions. "I mean, I've just got a lot on my mind," she tried to cover her mistake, but it was obvious that the other two weren't buying it when she saw them exchange a glance.

"What did the little dude do this time?" Cyborg asked, interested. Beast Boy could technically no longer be called "little dude", but the metal man had never discarded the nickname.

"Nothing," Raven told him, standing up and bringing her plate to the sink.

"But you said that you were worried about him." Starfire's face was creased in confusion.

"I did not." Raven felt that if she continued to deny it, they would probably get bored and leave it alone. Yeah, that would work. Hopefully.

"Raven, you are indeed acting strange," Starfire said, standing to bring her bowl of bright yellow oatmeal to the sink, placing it upon Raven's plate.

"Speak of the devil," Cyborg spoke just loud enough for the two girls to hear. They both turned in time to see Beast Boy stride into the room, eyes cast downward, avoiding any light sources. His hair was wet and hung in clumps around his face. He did not engage in any conversations with his fellow Titans, instead heading straight for the fridge. "You look kind of pail, BB," Cyborg said, quirking an eyebrow. "You sick or something?" Beast Boy shook his head and thrust his hand deep inside the bowels of the fridge, pulling out a carton of orange juice. He tipped it back and drank straight from the carton, downing what was left of the delicious citrus beverage.

"What has happened to your hand?" Starfire spotted the fresh bandage Beast Boy had applied to his lacerated palm. He looked down at the wrapped appendage and then hid it behind his back.

"Nothing," he mumbled, "I just… you know." Starfire nodded slowly and tried to catch Raven's eyes, but the dark teen would not allow the meeting to take place.

"You want me to make you some breakfast, BB?" Cyborg asked. He didn't like the way Beast Boy looked or was acting, something was obviously wrong. Today, Cyborg figured, it would be best to skip the usual meat versus tofu argument.

"No thanks, Cy," Beast Boy said, throwing the emptied carton of orange juice into the trash, I think I'm just gonna go to my room for a bit." He began to shuffle slowly towards the doors leading out of the common room.

"We need to talk, Beast Boy." Raven's voice cut through the silent room like a sword through flesh. The green Titan paused momentarily, but shrugged Raven off.

"Not now, Raven," Beast Boy told her, nearing the door to the common room. Raven suddenly grabbed the changeling's shoulder just before he passed through the exit. She didn't grab him hard, but it surprised Beast Boy and he jumped slightly. He turned toward Raven, a hand pressed hard to the side of his head, trying to keep the throbbing headache from tearing his head asunder.

"Can I help you?" He asked, slightly annoyed.

"We're supposed to talk, Beast Boy." Raven's face was blank.

"Talk?" Beast Boy's face molded itself into a confused frown. "What do you mean?" BB honestly had no idea what Raven was talking about. Maybe she fell down and hit her head. Maybe she's gone insane. Maybe… Oh no, she looks mad.

"Are you telling me you don't remember our little talk last night?" Raven asked, quirking an eyebrow. Beast Boy thought for a moment. Well, all he remembered was going to the bar to drink, and then nothing at all. Everything leading up to waking up this morning in his twisted and tangled bed didn't seem to want to be known. His memories kept themselves just out of his reach. He scrunched his face up in deep concentration, trying his hardest to lure them back.

"No, I don't remember anything," he said sadly. He knew he was in trouble though. If he had been that wasted and he had crossed Raven's path, nothing good could have possible come of it. He just hopped he hadn't made a total ass of himself. Raven sighed deeply.

"Beast Boy, come with me." She latched onto his elbow and led him away from the stares of the other Titans in the room whom had begun to inch closer, curious as to what was going on. As they went through the doors they passed Robin by.

"You don't look so good, Beast Boy," He said, stopping where he was. "Are you okay?" The green Titan let his eyes fall to the ground and stumbled over his feet, nearly tripping.

"I don't know," he said softly.

Robin's eyes tried to find Raven's as she helped to steady Beast Boy, still leading him along. She finally met Robin's gaze, a touch of sadness etched upon her face, and said to him, "But we're going to find out."


	4. Baring It All

Here's the next chapter. I'm really proud of this one and I got it out pretty fast too. I'm sorry if it takes me awhile to update, I'm doing my senior project right now and I have to work, so that takes up quite a bit of my time. Like I said, I'll try and get these chapters out every three or four days. Also, some of the reviewers have stated that they wouldn't read this anymore if it became a slash story, which is really a shame, but I'd hate to lose reviewers so I guess it's not going to be one. I wasn't sure if I was going to have it be one anyway, so oh well. And finally, feel free to email me anytime with suggestions for the story, I'd love to hear them.

Sorry for the long author's note, I hate it when writers do that, but here's the story. Enjoy.

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"I can feel it. Right now, it's sitting somewhere inside me and waiting to… I don't know, take over, I guess. I've felt it grow stronger, hungrier for the most awful things. Raven, you cannot even image the things it makes me see, the images it puts in my head." Beast Boy sat on the edge of Raven's bed with his forehead in his hands, his elbows on his knees. Raven, whom had pulled a chair up to right in front of him, stayed quiet and let Beast Boy do most of the talking. At first the shape-shifter had refused to speak, denying that there was anything wrong with him, denying that Raven had seen him in the kitchen the night before. But soon, after much prying, the floodgates had opened and everything came spilling out.

"What exactly do you mean by 'it'?" Raven asked finally. "Do you mean The Beast?" She, of course, was referring to the primal persona Beast Boy had taken on after their fight with Adonis all those years ago. Since then, The Beast had never been a problem again.

"I don't know," Beast Boy mumbled. "I guess it's similar, but last time when I was dealing with The Beast it was never like this. I mean, yeah, The Beast influenced my actions, you saw the way I acted, but he was never this… violent." Beast Boy spoke the last word in a whisper, and visibly shuddered. Whatever was happening to him was obviously incredibly disturbing to the Titan.

"So why do you think that drinking is the only thing that can help you?" Raven asked softly, shifting uncomfortably in her chair.

"I told you," Beast Boy said, quite obviously annoyed, "I've tried so many things to keep it at bay. At first, in the very beginning-" Beast Boy was cut off by Raven.

"You never said how long ago this started." She didn't feel good about interrupting him, but felt that this was a crucial fact that might need to be explored further in the future.

Beast Boy lifted his head from his hands and let his arms drop to hang down between his legs. He was leaning forward slightly and Raven could see the chain of a necklace disappear down into his white t-shirt. "It's hard to tell," he said, speaking slowly, thinking out his answer.

The entire time they had been in Raven's room, Beast Boy had not once looked her in the face, and when the dark Titan thought about it, she realized that it wasn't very often that she was able to directly see his wide, dark eyes. He seemed to avoid people's faces. "What do you mean?" She asked.

"Well," he continued, "it's hard to tell because… I think I have to show you how it feels first."

"How what feels?"

"How it feels when… when it starts to bubble up out of me." His eyes blackened. So did Raven's. The darkness of the room blanketed them. It choked them, pouring into their mouths and down into their lungs. It pushed in on them, holding them tight. It created a wall between them, making them feel miles and miles apart. Inside Raven felt that if she reached out a hand now, she would never be able to touch Beast Boy. At that moment, he was much too far away. But soon, very soon, Beast Boy would bring her closer than she had ever been before.

----------------

"What are they talking about in there?" Cyborg had pressed his robotic ear up against the door to Raven's room. Even with its amplified hearing, it could not breach the spells Raven had cast in order to ensure her privacy. Robin and Starfire had latched their ears upon the door in any place that their massive friend's frame did not block.

"I feel that it is not right for us to try and eardrop on our friends," Starfire said, concentrating hard on hearing through the door.

"I think you mean eavesdrop, Star," Robin said. His own ear was both freezing from the cold of the metal door, and painful from pressing hard into it. "And if you're so worried about it, why haven't you stopped?" Starfire ignored Robin and tried to think of other ways to hear what Beast Boy and Raven were talking about.

"She's right," Cyborg said, pushing himself away from the door. "I don't feel good about doing this." Starfire and Robin scrambled to get to the places their ears hadn't been able to reach when the metal teen had been in the way. "I'm just so worried about Beast Dude though. Raven knows something we don't, and the little green guy doesn't seem too happy about her knowing it."

"You should have seen him in the hall when Raven was leading him to her room." Robin gave up on hearing through the door and had let himself slide down the smooth wall, sitting cross legged with his chin in his hands. "Beast Boy looked like he was going to fall apart."

Starfire gave up on hearing through the door as well and decided to tell the others of another method she had been thinking of. "Perhaps I could fly up to Raven's window and see what it is they are doing." She nodded confidently at her own plan.

"That won't work, Star," Cyborg told her, sliding down beside Robin. "Raven always keeps her curtains closed." Starfire's face fell and she too slid down the wall and came to a rest. There was a long drawn out pause as the three each tried to come up with a plan whilst at the same time feeling bad about the prospect of spying.

"Hey," Cyborg said after awhile, "all the rooms in The Tower are equipped with cameras, right?"

"That's right," Robin said, seeing exactly where he was going with it. Starfire's eyes suddenly went wide.

"THERE IS A CAMERA IN MY ROOM!" She shouted. The two boys scooted away from her as quickly as they could. Robin held up his arms defensively, hoping to calm the raging alien.

"There are cameras all over in Titans Tower, but none of the ones in any of our rooms are ever on," Robin told her. She did not look convinced. "I swear it, Star," he said.

"You had better not be lying, Robin," Starfire warned him, "or I will make you pay." She had learned these words from Raven and they seemed to be quite effective.

"So do you think we should do it?" Cyborg asked after Starfire had been appeased. "Should we invade their privacy like that?"

"I think we should-" Robin started, but was cut off by the sound of Raven's door sliding open. Cool air rushed out to caress the skin of the three spying Titans. They all turned to see who was coming out. Starfire gasped.

"Beast Boy?"

----------------

"I don't think I can put it into words, Raven." Beast Boy sat up straight, cracking his fingers. "I can't put into words exactly how it feels, but I need you to know what its like."

"I see where you're going with this, Beast Boy," Raven said, also sitting up straighter. She was still trying to get the green Titan to look her in the face. He was clever though, looking just over the top of her head or to the side of it, creating the illusion that he was looking right at her. "And I can't do that."

"You started this Raven," Beast Boy said, "I didn't want to say anything, I was fine with how things were, I was taking care of it."

"No you were not," Raven spat, "you were just covering the problem up." Beast Boy ignored her remark. It stung, but he needed her to feel what he felt, and it would never happen if she were to get mad at him. Well, madder. He took a deep breath and tried again.

"Please do this Raven." He stood up and stepped across that infinite gap that had separated them. He passed through that wall of darkness and came to kneel beside Raven's chair. "I need you to understand."

Raven sighed and thought for a moment. Would it be wise to look into Beast Boy's head? It wasn't such a bad idea. If Raven did, she would know exactly how the changeling felt. It might even bring her a step closer to understanding what "it" was that haunted him. But there was an incredibly large problem. It was the reason Raven was hesitant to go through with this. Looking into someone's mind was not an easy task, and people tended to lock things away inside themselves, things they did not want others to see. For a person like Beast Boy, this was especially true. What if Raven saw or felt something she wasn't supposed to? What if she uncovered a secret that Beast Boy had folded up and hidden away at the corners of his mind? It was something she was really hoping to avoid, but it was a risk she would have to take.

"Okay," she spoke finally, "I'll do it." The corners of Beast Boy's mouth twitched into a little smile for just a moment before returning to a straight line.

"What do I do?" He breathed, barely above a whisper, seemingly in awe over an event that had yet to occur. Raven stood and pushed her chair out of the way, kneeling in front of Beast Boy so that they were just inches apart. She could smell his breath, minty from his toothpaste with a tinge of orange juice from this morning.

"Close your eyes," she said. He did so the moment the words left her mouth. "Relax. Breathe slowly, calmly." His breathing changed immediately. "Concentrate on the memory you want me to see and nothing else at all." A look of concentration passed across Beast Boy's face as he picked out the perfect memory. "Are you ready?" Raven asked. Beast Boy nodded.

-----------------

Starfire gasped.

"Beast Boy?"

The green titan stood at the door to Raven's room, head facing toward the ground. The figure of Raven could be seen standing a few feet behind him. She had balled her hands up and pressed them to her chest, her head hung down as well.

"Now you know," Beast Boy spoke softly. "Now you know… what it's like to have this thing inside you." He lifted his head and the other Titan's could see that tears were falling freely from his eyes, little streams of sorrow dripping down to stain the floor and the white of his shirt. But his face contained none of the sadness that his eyes hinted at. It was completely blank and unfeeling. "Now you know," he continued, "why it is I go to that bar." He stepped over Starfire, Robin, and Cyborg, whom still remained slumped on the floor, and headed down the hall.

"Beast Boy!" Raven called, emerging from her room. She too was crying. But unlike him, her face held an obvious hurt. The green Titan ignored her and continued on, disappearing around a corner.

"Raven?" Robin stood and placed a hand on the frightened girl's shoulder. She recoiled from his touch momentarily before leaning back into it. "What happened?" He asked.

"I… I looked into his mind," Raven said, a shudder passing through her frame. "He said I needed to know." She placed her hands over her face. "The things I saw and felt," she continued, "were more horrible than anything I could have ever imagined." Cyborg and Robin exchanged wary glances.

"What did you see?" Cyborg asked, standing and closing the distance between himself and Raven. "Tell us what you saw."


	5. Cold and Alone

Yes I know, it's kind of short, but I just couldn't stop writing this chapter so I cut it in half. Here's the first half, I just have to add the finishing touches to the second half and then I'll post it. You're going to hate me for not posting the rest after you read the end of this chapter, but that is a risk I am willing to take. Enjoy.

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"Thank you, Cyborg." Raven graciously accepted the cup of hot tea from her friend, placing it in front of her and letting the mug warm her hands. Thick white steam danced erratically across the surface of the amber liquid.

"Is there anything else that you need?" Starfire asked, leaning toward Raven. Her face was filled to the brim with a look of concern. Raven smiled meekly and shook her head.

The Titans had congregated in the main room of Titans tower after pulling Raven together. They had mounted a brief search for Beast Boy, but had decided finding him could wait until later. In Raven's shattered state, she didn't even think to warn them of what he could have possibly been doing out by himself.

"Are you ready to tell us what happened?" Robin asked gently. Starfire cast him an angry look for trying to press information out of the poor girl so soon.

Raven hesitated. She glanced to her left and looked out over the bay to the city, then over the city to the mountains. A wisp of cloud much like the steam in her mug hung around one jagged peak, framing it like a halo. Was it right for her to tell the other Titans what was going on with Beast Boy? That was his business. True, she had forced it out of him, but she had been incredibly worried. Undoubtedly the other Titans were worried as well; she could see it on their faces. It was obvious they were hiding behind masks constructed with trembling hands. She would at least wait for Beast Boy to get back before telling the other Titans anything.

"I don't think I can tell you exactly what happened," Raven spoke suddenly. "I don't want to do this without Beast Boy's consent. Also, he's not here to defend himself, that's not fair." Starfire, Cyborg, and Robin exchanged wary glances.

"Has friend Beast Boy done something so wrong that he would need to defend himself?" Starfire asked, floating uncomfortably close to Raven. The dark teen could smell her perfume. It was incredibly sweet, lending to mind images of sun soaked fields of never ending flowers. It was not unpleasant, but Raven thought it was an exact opposite of the feelings the current situation should have invoked.

"Sort of," Raven told her. "Beast Boy is dealing with something incredibly hard right now, and he needs our support whether he thinks so or not." Robin's mouth did its best to keep from doing so, but it eventually formed into a frown.

"Raven, I really think you need to tell us what exactly is going on. You were terrified after you saw whatever it was that you saw in Beast Boy's head." Robin sat down next to Raven and looked her straight in the eye, something Beast Boy couldn't do.

The fluorescent lights above them buzzed and shuttered slightly. Dark clouds marched in from the north and attacked the unbroken sky. The cloud's cavalry came in the form of high waves rushing into the bay, beating at the rocks on the shores of Titan's Tower. Robin leaned forward, so close to Raven that she could feel the warmth rolling off of his body and falling onto her own. "Tell us what you saw."

-----------------

Beast Boy's eyes had bled saline for some time after he had left Titan's Tower. He couldn't seem to get the tears to stop. They kept coming, spilling down his face. He wiped at them irritably until finally there was nothing left to cry.

It was incredibly cold out, and the icy winds cut at his exposed skin, leaving him shivering. He cursed himself for not grabbing his coat. He hadn't had time though. He couldn't have gone to his room; they would have found him before he had had a chance to leave. Together they would have interrogated him; all four of them circled around him, peering down into his face and demanding answers.

"Such a fuck up," he hissed to himself, "why couldn't you have just kept it to yourself?" He wasn't being fair though, how could he have possibly known that Raven would have reacted in such a way? He hadn't meant for her to see so much. He couldn't possibly go back now, at least for a while. But how long should he wait? A day? A week? Longer?

Beast Boy's body was shaking visibly now. The cold was unbearable. His teeth cracked together over and over and over and over and over. Frost crystals spread like a delicate spider's web through his still wet emerald tresses. 'I have to get out of the cold.'

"This is crazy," Beast Boy said suddenly. "I have to go back. I can't just stay out here in this weather, and maybe Raven hasn't told them anything." He knew that that was highly unlikely, but he would just have to deal with whatever they had for him when he got back to the tower. He quickly turned around and headed back the way he came.

"Ow," Beast Boy yelped suddenly, feeling a prick of pain at the back of his neck. After the initial pain, there were pulses of a lesser degree in the same spot. Beating, beating, beating like a heart. He reached back a green hand and felt a trickle blood run down his neck. Down in his chest a pressure was spreading out from his lungs and into his limbs. What was he feeling? This was nothing like the feeling he got when The Beast made itself known, but what else could it be? Dizzy figures swam in front of his eyes. Buildings became faces that opened their mouths and laughed at him, taunting him for not being able to control the thing that made him its home.

Beast Boy's legs collapsed under him and he hit the ground hard. He could feel the cold cement of the sidewalk pushing through his clothes and assaulting his skin. Just before his eyelids slid shut, he could swear he saw a figure standing over him. He tried to warn them, tried to tell them to run away. The green Titan didn't know what The Beast was capable of, he only knew what it wanted. It wanted death and destruction. It wanted blood to flow, lives to end. Beast Boy's mouth was mush though, he couldn't get it to work. And as he passed into darkness, he preyed for this person's soul.

-----------

"No," Raven said right out. "I will not."

"You have to tell us," Robin said angrily, "this is important!"

"It is important, yes," Raven said, standing and knocking her tea to the ground. The mug exploded into a handful of tiny pieces that sat amongst the splattered tea like it was bleeding to death. "But I cannot and I will not tell you things you do not need to know."

"Why not?" Robin looked like a toddler whose toy was stolen away from him.

"Because the things I saw and felt would tear you up inside!" Raven screamed. She'd lost it. She had been calm, but she couldn't hold it in any longer. "Beast Boy is scared," Raven continued, "and I'm scared for him. I'm scared he's going insane, I'm scared he won't be able to hold on. Because of that, Robin, because of that and so much more, I will not tell you what I saw!"

The lights above them flickered and exploded. Glass rained down upon the four Titans. Random objects within fifteen feet of Raven disintegrated into nothing but powder. Scorch marks streaked across the kitchen table like it had been licked by an invisible fire. The hands on the clock beside the television that was flickering on and off spun round and round upon its face. The windows gazing out on the bay warped and bent as if touched by a great heat, and the moment everything had calmed down, the common room door slid slowly open with an electric whir, and a lone figure staggered in.

Beast Boy was covered all over with splashes of drying and still wet blood. It stained his hair and skin darker, and stood out so much against his white dirt smudged shirt, that the crimson liquid almost appeared to be glowing.

"Dude…" Cyborg's mouth hung open.

Beast Boy took another sticky step forward. "Help me," he said softly before falling forward onto the cold metal floor.


	6. Cleaning The Sin

Here's chapter six in which we find out if Beast Boy's okay or not. Think he's dead? Well you're dumb then. Think he's naked? Well, maybe you're a little smarter. Bonus points to anyone who can figure out what all the titles of the chapters have in common. Other than being the titles of chapters for this story, of course. On to the story.

Enjoy.

---------

"Where is he cut?" Raven was the first to reach Beast Boy's body. The others were close behind. She checked his pulse and made sure he was breathing before searching his body for wounds. "I don't see any cuts."

"Turn him over," Robin said, reaching his hands under Beast Boy and flipping him onto his stomach. They searched for a moment more before realizing that the only wounds on their green friend's body were minor bruises.

"Then, this isn't…" Starfire was confused. "This is not his blood? Then why has he passed out if it was not from the loss of his fluids?"

"He seems fine, looks like he was just overloaded," Cyborg said, gently slipping his hand under their unconscious friend's body and picking him up. "I guess he just sort of passed out." Cyborg stood and walked through the doors and into the hallway leading away from the common room. "I think we should take him to the infirmary." Starfire, Raven, and Robin were close behind.

"Whose blood could this be?" Raven asked, confused.

"I don't know," Robin said, "but we've got to get it off him."

Cyborg nodded his head in agreement. "We'll have to do some tests to make sure he didn't catch any… diseases."

"If he had gotten into a fight, we he not have called us?" Starfire asked.

"There's something not right about this." Raven stared at Beast Boy's limp body, bouncing slightly in Cyborg's arms. His mouth hung open and Raven could see that there was dry blood at the corners of his lips. Had he… bitten someone?

"Well there's obviously something not right about this, Raven." Cyborg turned his head back to her, "it's not everyday that your best friend shows up covered in blood!" Raven was shocked to see the look on her metal friend's face. He looked completely destroyed. Broken. Gone.

"Calm down, Cyborg," Robin said, "this is horrible, yes, but yelling at Raven isn't going to help anything out."

"Sorry, Rave, but this is really freaky." Cyborg looked down at Beast Boy's face and Starfire brushed away a drop of blood before it had a chance to run into his open mouth.

--------

Raven had always hated the infirmary. But really, what was there to like? No visit was ever pleasant. There were really only two reasons to come here. Either you were hurt, or you were visiting someone else who was hurt. Wonderful. Everything shone with the glean of polished steel. All was kept in precise order. It never harbored the same smells, save perhaps blood or some disgusting medicine.

"We have to get him out of these clothes," Cyborg said, placing Beast Boy's lithe frame on a metal bed that was much too smooth, much too shiny.

"Okay girls," Robin said, turning to Raven and Starfire. "It's guy time now."

"Oh come on, Robin!" Raven glanced back at Beast Boy. Had his eyes been open, this would be the first time he had ever looked at her directly. "It's not like we're here to enjoy the show."

"Yes, Robin," Starfire said nodding her head enthusiastically. "We will not be doing the perverting."

"Come on, guys," Robin was serious, "think about how Beast Boy would feel if he knew you saw him naked."

"Fine," Raven grumbled heading away from Beast Boy and pulling Starfire along behind her. The two exited the room and sat in the uncomfortable chairs parked outside. The lights above them hummed gently. Metallic scrapes like cricket chirps called out from where Starfire's chair met the floor. She was nervously scooting back and forth.

"I wish we could see what was going on," Raven said, wondering how long it would be until Robin and Cyborg were finished.

"Oh!" Starfire's head perked up suddenly. "Raven! There are cameras in the infirmary, yes?" Maybe it was her fractured state, but for some reason it took Raven much longer than it should have to grasp what Starfire was saying. Slowly a smile spread across her face.

"You're a genius, Star," Raven said, standing up and again grabbing the other girl's hand to pull her along.

Located seemingly randomly in Titan's Tower were several computer terminals from which any of the Titan's could access the Tower's main computer. There were a few restrictions on these terminal, they couldn't do _all_ that the main computer could, but they _could _do what Starfire and Raven needed them for.

"Okay," Raven said, beginning to type at one of the terminals. "We must never breathe a word of this to Beast Boy lest we wish him to explode from embarrassment."

"I do not wish for friend Beast Boy to explode," Starfire said, wondering if this was such a good idea after all. "Maybe we shouldn't…" Raven found the correct camera and the screen flickered for a moment before registering a clear picture of the infirmary.

-------------

"Okay, Robin," Cyborg said, throwing him a washcloth, "we gotta get him out of these clothes, and then we have to wash the rest of the blood off his skin." Robin's face reddened.

"I don't know who's gonna be more embarrassed," Robin sighed, "me, or Beast Boy when he wakes up."

"Come on, man," Cyborg said gently, "we gotta do this." Very carefully Cyborg grabbed Beast Boy's shirt and raised it over his head, yanking it off of him. After a few more minutes and many, many, many embarrassed pauses, Beast Boy lay before the two blushing teens completely naked. "Step two," Cyborg said, reaching out and gently scrubbing away a streak of crusty blood from off of his green friend's arm.

"This is weird," Robin grumbled, working at removing a bloodstain on Beast Boy's wrist.

"I know, but it needs to be done."

"Good thing not much blood soaked through his pants, I don't know if I could go… down there."

"Shut up and wash."

---------------

Silence. Red faces. Mouths open.

"Raven?"

"Yes Starfire?"

"I feel funny."

"Me too."

They had watched the scene quietly. They felt bad for spying, but they needed to know everything was okay. On the screen in front of them Robin and Cyborg had finished with Beast Boy and the latter was pulling a hospital gown around his now no longer hemoglobin stained body.

"I think we can go back now, Star," Raven said, turning away from the screen and heading back to the infirmary.

----------

"You guys can come back in now." The Boy Wonder poked his head out the doors leading to the hallway and found the place to be quite deserted. "Hello?" Up ahead a ways he saw Raven and Starfire round a corner. "Where did you guys go?" He asked.

"We were just…" Starfire started.

"Checking on things," Raven finished. The two pushed passed him and into the infirmary, barring any questions he might have had.

Cyborg had just finished transferring Beast Boy to a non-metallic hospital bed when Raven approached him. "Did you find anything new?" Her eyes were wide and, in Cyborg's opinion, slightly psychotic.

"Just some bruises here and there," he said. "There's a strange one on the back of his neck."

"Hmmm." Raven was curious. She reached over to Beast Boy and gently turned his head away from her so that she could better see this bruise that Cyborg spoke of. "Wow," she said, seeing it for herself. It was similar to a normal bruise in that it was black and blue, but what made this one particularly special was that it seemed to be a perfect circle that radiated out from a single black dot at its center. On Beast Boy's dark skin it was hard to make out, but the dot seemed to be a puncture wound. Raven gasped suddenly as Beast Boy's hand reached up and grabbed hers.

"Rave…"

"Beast Boy?" Raven turned back to the others and called them over quickly. "He's awake," she said, and everyone came rushing to his side.

"Are you okay?

"What happened?"

"Who did this?"

"Shut up!" Cyborg, Starfire, and Robin could have sworn that Raven's eyes went red for a moment. "Shut up," she said again, this time more gently. "Beast Boy?" She asked softly.

Green eyelids slid open slowly. Beast Boy stared up at four smudged faces. Distant noises echoed around him, slow and deep. He felt the bed underneath him, warm, soft, inviting, and for a minute his eyes slid close again. Snap. His eyes again presented themselves as his brain caught up with his body. This time everything was in focus, faces were clear.

"Hey guys," he said quietly, his throat felt like it was full of needles. His lips perked up at the corners and a small smile played out on his face. "What'd I miss?"


	7. Is This The Truth?

Here's an extra long chapter, my Christmas (or whatever holiday you celebrate) present to you. I think you'll like this one, I did a lot of evil scientist laughs while writing this. There's a whole lot in there that'll have you gasping, maybe even crying (okay, I'm not that good of a writer), but there are a few moments that BB/Rae shippers will love.

Asinine11 wins my little contest. He (or she? Maybe?) was right in saying that all the chapter titles have four syllables in them. The first two were just coincidence, but now I do it on purpose. Your prize is… well, what do you want? Let me now and I'll see what I can do.

GirlAnachronism is my special friend now for offering me cookies and calling me babe.

Sorry for the long Author's Note, you know how I hate them. Here's the story, enjoy.

**----------**

Starfire's right eye twitched spastically and her hands, which she held behind her back, turned white from being clenched so hard. "BEAST BOY!" She suddenly exploded, throwing herself on top of the green titan.

"Ahhh!" He screamed in both surprise and pain.

"IwassoworriedandIthoughtyouwerehurt!" Starfire's words collided with one another. It was like a train wreck, there was incredible chaos. She squeezed Beast Boy so tightly blue could be registered on even his face. "Therewasbloodeverywherebutnocuts!" Still no one had the faintest as to what she was saying. Beast Boy tried his best to be polite and nod every once in a while, as if he was actually following. "AndthenyouwerenakedandtherewasmorebloodonyouandIwasreallyreallyscared!"

"Starfire! You're killing him!" Robin reached over and pried the frantic girl off of their bed ridden friend.

"I'm kind of dizzy," Beast Boy said, "I think I'm gonna puke and…. Wait! Why was I naked!" The poor fellow had grasped some of what Starfire had said. looking down at himself, he saw for the first time that he was not dressed in his clothes, but a hospital gown.

"Well, uh," Cyborg scratched at the back of his head and tried to search for an answer. "First tell us what happened."

"Well, I was actually gonna ask you that same question," Beast Boy said, still incredibly embarrassed. "Were we in a fight?"

Raven sighed. "You don't remember anything?" She asked, irritably. Beast Boy shook his head sadly. "Do you remember the little talk we had in my room?"

"Yeah," he said, "I do remember that." Beast Boy nervously fidgeted with the sleeve of his hospital gown. "I remember leaving The Tower, and then I was outside, and it was really cold and…. Then I was here."

"You want to know what happened?" Cyborg asked, his face was cast downward, he dared not look at anyone. "Something happened to you out there, and then you came back here covered in blood! You were drenched from head to tow in red, warm blood, Beast Boy, and it scared the shit out of us."

Beast Boy's lungs were burning. He had been holding his breath. Something churned in his stomach and the sudden urge to throw up was overwhelming. "I… I don't know what to say." His chest started to rise and fall in rapid succession and his hands began to shake. "I don't know what happened."

"Beast Boy," Raven grabbed his hands to keep them from shaking. "You need to calm down, you're having a panic attack." Beast Boy closed his eyes and took a deep breath and released it slowly. There was a long, quiet pause between the group as they let Beast Boy calm himself down.

"Hold out your arm, BB," Cyborg said after awhile. He had waited until Beast Boy calmed down, doing this while he was worked up wouldn't go over so well.

"Why?" He asked, timidly.

"I need to draw some blood to make sure you're okay." Cyborg's voice was incredibly gentle, soothing. Even if it hadn't been, even if he had been shouting, Beast Boy would have trusted him. He never doubted Cyborg's intentions. Beast Boy carefully, slowly held out his arm. Cyborg gently grabbed it and swabbed rubbing alcohol onto a spot just under the inside of Beast Boy's elbow.

"You can look away, you know," Raven said. Beast Boy had been staring fixated at the spot that he knew would be pierced.

"No," he breathed, "I don't mind." Raven could pick up the almost obsessive edge his voice had taken on.

"Okay, BB," Cyborg said, holding up a small tube with a needle at its tip, "just keep breathing normal, okay, and don't clench your hand or flex the muscles in your arm." Beast Boy nodded quickly. A metal hand gently placed the sharp point of the needle on BB's flesh and pushed until it sunk slowly into soft, green flesh. Beast Boy's eyes closed halfway for a moment, almost as if in pleasure. A warm jet of red blood shot suddenly into the metal tube at the end of the needle, and inside his stomach, Beast Boy felt a jerk of immense ecstasy.

"I need to take one more," Cyborg said, twisting the glass tube until it detached from the needle, which remained in BB's arm, and screwing in another, identical tube. Again, a jet of blood shot into the tube and the glass was suddenly filled with Beast Boy's life essence. This time Cyborg removed the whole apparatus, needle and all. Beast Boy reached his other arm over and brushed his fingers across the spot where he had been punctured, drawing a long streak of red, which look more like black against his skin, down his arm. Cyborg returned once more and sealed the hole with a band aid and a gauze ball.

"Okay," Robin said, "now we need to talk." Beast Boy's head snapped away from the spot on his arm and went up to Robin.

"About what?" He asked, almost shyly. He didn't like being surrounded like this. He knew these people's intentions were good, but it was still discomforting that they were all standing around him. And now he was being questioned.

"Come on, Beast Boy," Robin said a little irritably, "you know what about. I know you said you couldn't remember anything, but you gotta try."

"I…" Beast Boy felt so enclosed, trapped. "I want to talk to Raven," he said, "alone." Robin didn't look happy. "I promise you and I will talk after, but first I need to talk to Rae."

"We'll only be a minute," Raven said, placing her hand upon Robin's shoulder. She wanted to have this talk as much as Beast Boy.

"Alright," he said, "I'll be back in a little while." He turned away and walked toward the door.

"Wait for me, Robin," Starfire said, following him out. Cyborg turned toward his little green friend.

"I'm gonna go run some tests on these," he said, holding up the blood he had drained from Beast Boy. "Rest up, okay?"

"I will," BB said, "uh… thank you, Cyborg," his hands had gone back to nervously fidgeting with his hospital gown, "for everything." Cyborg smiled but said nothing. He followed Robin and Starfire out. Raven and Beast Boy were now alone. Raven turned toward her bed ridden friend. He was still nervously fidgeting. She didn't know what to say. How do you start a conversation like this one?

"So I was completely naked, huh?" Beast Boy asked out of nowhere. She looked down at him and his face had been painted with a blush. Raven could feel a laugh raising out of her, but she held it in, settling instead on a small smile.

"Well yeah," she said, "We had to get you out of those clothes and wash that blood off your body."

"Oh great," Beast Boy said sarcastically, "that's just fantastic."

"Me and Star left," she said, figuring it might ease his embarrassment a little. It couldn't make things worse. "It was just Cyborg and Robin."

"That must have been splendid for them," he said. He smirked a little, thinking about how they must have felt about it. He was grateful though, grateful that they would do that for him. It got quiet again. The silence dragged on for some time. Beast Boy cracked his knuckles, Raven coughed, these were the only sounds for who knows how long. Minutes, hours, could have been days. It seemed like forever.

"I think I can taste it," Beast Boy said suddenly. Raven looked up and watched as his tongue darted out and circled his lips carefully, paying extra attention to the corners of his mouth.

"What do you mean?" She asked. His eyes slowly slid shut for a moment and then opened again just as slowly, as if the ability to blink had become an incredibly draining task to him. He took a deep breath and then let it out in a long sigh.

"Blood." His mouth sagged into a frown and his hand went up to pull on a tentacle of hair that had fallen in front of one of his eyes. It was such a childish gesture. He looked so helpless. "I can taste it in my mouth, Raven, metallic and bitter."

"You're imagining it," she told him. His hand dropped from his hair and he shook his head.

"I'm not imaging it." He pushed himself up into a sitting position and pulled his knees to his chest. "I… what did I do?" His head was facing Raven, resting on his knees, and Raven could see that thick, wet drops were slowly falling down his face. "What the hell happened to me out there?" Raven closed her eyes and sighed. She reached out her hand and it hung in the air awkwardly for a moment before she let it drop onto Beast Boy's back. He jumped slightly but then welcomed the touch. Raven moved her hand in a slow circle, doing her best to comfort her friend.

"I swear to you, Beast Boy," she said, letting her hand explore the warmth of his back and shoulders, "that I… _we_ will find out what happened out there, and that everything will be okay."

"Do you promise, Rae?" He asked, sitting up turning toward her. Raven was shocked to find that his eyes were focused dead center on hers. She could feel herself falling into his dark orbs that reflected the light of the room as bright rectangular boxes at the edges of his pupils. She was swimming in their infinite dark and murky depth, drowning in complete bliss. She nodded slowly, her hair framing her face like a veil, but her own eyes had yet to blink, as if they wanted nothing more than to be locked in eternal gaze with Beast Boy's, like they didn't want to miss a single moment spent in his glare.

"You know," she said, finally allowing her watering eyes to blink and hydrate themselves, "This is the first time you've ever looked me straight in the eyes." He nodded.

"Yeah." Her hand had stopped rubbing his back when he had made her promise that everything would be okay, but it now resumed it ministrations, making Beast Boy sigh comfortably.

"Why is that?" She asked.

"Because now you know my secret," he said darkly. She could feel the thumping of his heart even through his back. It was beating strong and fast, speeding up at an irrational rate. She knew what he was talking about.

"I didn't mean for you to see so much, Rae," he said, and still the beating increased. "Now you know why I'm so scared of this thing that's inside me. You know what it wants me to do."

----------

Back in the common room Robin waited quite patiently while Raven and Beast Boy talked in the infirmary. He hated being left in the dark, but he was going to have a little talk with Beast Boy later to clear some things up.

"I am most glad indeed that Beast Boy is okay," Starfire said cheerily. She sat to Robin's right on the U-shaped couch with her hands clasped tightly in her lap, a smile stapled to her face.

"Me too, Star," Robin said, "but he's not out of the clear yet." The alien girl's face contorted into a confused expression.

"But he is unharmed and awake," she said, "how is he not in the clear?" Robin shifted uncomfortably. He himself knew why, but he hadn't really thought about it, it had just sort of been at the back of his mind, drilling at him uncomfortably, but still sealed away, making him feel safe about it.

"Well," he started hesitantly, "there are certain diseases that are transmitted through blood." Starfire thought for a moment but seemed to follow. "We have to do some tests to see if Beast Boy caught any of them."

"Can these diseases be transmitted through infected blood just on Beast Boy's skin?" She asked. Robin shook his head.

"It would have to get into his body," he told her, "through a cut or something." She looked as though she were about to speak, but Robin stopped her before she could say what he knew she would, "even a really, really, tiny cut, Star, one that we can't see could potentially make Beast Boy at risk." Talking about it really hurt, and Robin's insides were squirming.

"What kind of…." Starfire bit her bottom lip for a moment before continuing. "What kind of diseases, Robin?"

"Um," Off the top of his head Robin knew of only two, but he was sure there were more. "First there's hepatitis."

"Is not that curable?" Starfire's eyes shined with hope.

"Yes," Robin said, "some types of hepatitis are curable." Robin nervously played with a loose string on the cushion of the couch.

"What is the other disease, Robin?" Starfire asked, "you said there were two." Robin took a deep breathe.

"The other disease that…. That Beast Boy may have been exposed to is HIV." He held his breath. Starfire's eyes darkened.

"I have heard of this," she said, slowly, "it is… very bad."

"Well, yeah," Robin said gently, "it would be very bad, yes, but if we catch it now we'll be able to stop it before it becomes full blown AIDS, which would be even worse." Starfire leaned forward and pulled Robin into a hug. The only noise in the room was the soft babble of the television and the breathing of two scared teenagers.

"I have much fear for our friend," Starfire said. "Not just for his possible maladies, but also for the fact that something else is very much wrong with him." Robin nodded slowly. They remained tightly clenched together for a moment more before they released each other and leaned back into the couch.

Something on the television caught Robin's eye. A breaking news report had just started and he listened intently. "We now go live to John Campbell who is at the scene of the horrific incident as we speak."

"Good evening." The camera cut from the newsroom to a tall reporter somewhere on the streets of Jump City. "I'm John Campbell, and today is a day that will forever be clouded by sorrow in the history books of our fine city. I'm here now in front of Marco's Deli where just one half hour ago the owner, Mr. Gregory Marco, went out into the ally behind his shop to discover what can only be described as a massacre. Four bodies have so far been discovered in the blood drenched ally, but so many of the bodies lay in pieces that police investigators speculate that there may be more uncovered as soon as they have searched the entire ally, which runs for two blocks. Police say that nearly every inch of that two block span is splattered with blood below head level. Not much information has been released yet, but police are saying that the victims have lacerations on them common to marks left by some kind of an animal, and police suspect that whomever is responsible for these killings is in possession of some sort of wild animal."

Numb. That's all that Robin felt. Numb from head to toe. Nothing worked. Nothing moved. He couldn't will himself to do anything. He couldn't breathe, and his lungs burned, begging him to take in a breath. He didn't care, he didn't want to breathe. This couldn't be real. This couldn't be true. It had to be fake. It had to be lies.


	8. Revelation

It has been very long since I last updated, and I am truly sorry. Some things came up, but that is no excuse, it is unfair of me to make those of you who have been reading this to wait so long. I adore you and respect you and hope you can forgive me. I do try and update this quickly, but things will come up, and I often get stuck for ideas. Again, if you have suggestions, I am totally open to them, and I will give you credit if I use them. However, I do have a general idea where I want this to go and know the basic outline.

Damn the long author's note. Enjoy the chapter.

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Raven's hand moved slowly and with purpose up Beast Boy's chest and settled on a spot just over his suddenly accelerating heart. Her fingers rubbed slow circles over him. Her hand was warm and heavy, and the material of the hospital gown slid smoothly across his skin.

"Raven… what….?" His voice was soft and unsure. She hushed him with a look, a grin pulling at her lips.

"I've always wanted to explore your body," she said softly, a blush passing across her cheeks. "Are…. Are you really green _everywhere_?" His skin had always been a tender subject for the changeling, but Raven's voice held nothing offensive in it, purely a joyful curiosity.

"Yes." Beast Boy didn't so much speak the word as breathe it. He didn't know if it was an answer to her question or a response to her hand rubbing on his chest. He couldn't believe this was happening. Was it real? Was it a fantasy? Beast Boy decided he didn't care.

Raven pulled herself up onto the hospital bed so that she was kneeling next to Beast Boy, hovering over him, her hand moving down to tickle his stomach. She looked down at him, straight into those warm brown eyes. Her free hand went to his face and she ran a finger up his cheek, smiling at the stubble she found there.

Beast Boy brought his hand up to the one Raven had placed on his face and gently removed it from his cheek, holding it up to study it in front him. He laced his fingers with hers and marveled at the contrast of pale grey on forest green skin. Her hand was smaller, more delicate, and incredibly soft, whereas his was slightly larger, not rough by any means, but sported a callus here and there from the hours of video game play. He brought her hand to his mouth and, hesitating for only a moment, kissed each of her fingers.

Raven, in a move Beast Boy felt was bold for her, but had absolutely no objections to, swung her leg over Beast Boy's frame and straddled his stomach. She felt heavy and her thighs radiated warmth, making Beast Boy nervous. Where was this leading?

"Raven," Beast Boy said, an edge of apprehension in his voice, "I…" Raven leaned forward and placed her hands on either side of Beast Boy's head, staring down at him. She was gorgeous.

"Yes, Garfield?" Her breath was warm on his face, tingling in the most pleasant of ways. Her eyes glinted with mischief, and her smile grew larger, lips parting to show her shining white teeth.

"You're beautiful," he said, bringing his arms up to wrap around her, pulling her down closer to him, swimming in the warmth her body draped him in. Slowly, so very slowly, Raven leaned down, her lips targeting Beast Boy's. Her hair stuck his cheeks and tickled his skin and finally her lips brushed his, shooting electric bolts down Beast Boy's body.

"Beaaaaaaaaast Boy……" Dark brown eyes opened like a shot. A heart beat dangerously fast, pounding out an erratic rhythm. Had that voice been in his head? Beast Boy sat up and looked around. It had been a dream. Looking down his body, the green Titan saw that, although Raven in bed with him had been a fantasy, his body had reacted as if it had been a reality. His erection throbbed painfully between his legs and he shifted his weight so that his it moved into a more comfortable position.

Groggily he tried to remember what had happened before he had fallen asleep. It came back to him after a moment of rubbing at his eyes. Robin had entered the room and called Raven to him. There was something strange about the way he had acted. His eyes never left Beast Boy, and it made the changeling feel an uncomfortable tingling in his stomach.

Raven had nodded to The Boy Wonder, telling Beast Boy she would return soon, and followed Robin out, dimming the lights as she left. BB had no idea how long ago that had been. When would Raven return? They still had things to talk about.

Now, what had woken him up? Whatever he had heard left him with an uncomfortable, strange feeling. He perked his ears up to try and better find the sound.

"Beaaaaaaaaast Boy……" There it was again. It filled up the whole room, seeming to come from everywhere at once. Beads of sweat began to form on Beast Boy's brow. That voice sounded familiar, but he couldn't quite place it.

"Over here," it said suddenly. The titan swung his legs off the bed and let his bare feet land on the metal floor. The skin on the soles of his feet screamed at him for the sudden change in temperature. He moved toward where he felt the voice had come, but until it spoke again, he wouldn't be able to pinpoint its location.

"You're getting warmer," it said, almost smugly. He took a step toward the noise. "Warmer... Warmer…" Beast Boy's eyes landed on a red plastic bag emblazoned with a black bio-hazard stamp. He placed his hand upon it and the voice rang out again, "You're on fire!" At these words Beast Boy felt something unpleasant trickle down his spine, and the voice let out a hearty laugh. Very carefully, he opened the bag and dumped its contents out, finding them to be the clothes he had worn earlier in the day. They were stiff and stained an almost black color by the blood that permeated their every fiber.

"Where the fuck are you?" The Titan asked impatiently, growing tired of this game. The voice did not answer. Beast Boy went through the pocket of the pants he had worn. His hand hit something in the right pocket of his jeans and for some reason it startled him, and he pulled his hand away for a moment before going back in and pulling the object out.

"Bingo," the voice said, and suddenly Beast Boy knew where he had heard it before. The object that had been in his pocket was a communicator of some sort, similar to the ones the Titan's used. Like theirs, this one had a view screen, but it was no a Titan that was staring coldly up at the changeling.

"Jinx." Beast Boy spat the word out as if it had pierced his tongue.

"That's right, Beast Boy," Jinx said, "I'm so glad you remember me. I was afraid you'd have a concussion after your little fight."

"What are you… Wait, so you know what happened to me?" Beast Boy was shocked. Had he fought with Jinx? The entire Hive Five?

"I do indeed," Jinx said, nodding slightly.

"We fought?" Beast Boy asked, not knowing why Jinx was talking to him at all. If they had fought, then the blood Beast Boy had been covered in had to have been Jinx's. There had been so much blood that some of it had to belong to her. But the witch looked fine.

"You and I?" She asked. "No, we did not fight."

"Then what happened?" Beast Boy asked impatiently. His eyes went to the door a few steps from his position. Where was Raven? Why hadn't she returned?

"Well, I guess I could tell you," The pink haired bitch mused, messing with something in front of her just off camera. "But I'd rather show you." Suddenly Jinx's face disappeared and was replaced by a breaking news story. Beast Boy watched and listened patiently as the story of the alley massacre was laid out before him. His breathing quickened steadily until a point at which he was barely taking any oxygen in. Purple and blue ghosts passed in front of his eyes and his body felt heavy and tired. He willed himself to breathe normal.

"That's not real," Beast Boy told Jinx when the newscast was replaced by his enemies face. His body was trembling slightly as he held the communicator in his hand.

"What? You think I'd make this up?" The leader of the Hive Five let out that laugh again, the one Beast Boy was growing to hate. "If you don't believe me just turn on your t.v., it's on every channel." Jinx hesitated for a moment before saying, "well, I guess you won't be able to do that after all."

"What do you mean?" Beast Boy asked skeptically.

"Oh nothing," she said, as if it were nothing, "it's just that there's no way you'd be able to get to a t.v., being locked in that room and all."

Beast Boy took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. His eyes went to the door and he hesitantly took a step toward it. Would it be locked, or was Jinx lying? Had Robin seen the news report? Was that why he had come to get Raven? So many questions. It made sense, though, if Robin had seen what Beast Boy had seen, then he would have gotten Raven and locked him in here where he wasn't able to hurt anyone.

"I... don't… believe you," Beast Boy said slowly, trying to will himself to move faster toward the door.

"You don't sound so sure about that," Jinx said, voice cold and low. "Try the door." Slim fingers hung in the air like a spider on its thread. "Put your hand on the knob." Delicately, the spider fingers were pressed to the door's handle. "Turn." Nothing. Beast Boy tried again and again. He turned as hard as he could, but still the door did not open. Furiously he pounded on the cold metal.

"It's a lie," he shouted, "it's a lie."

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On the other side of the door, Starfire's eyes widened and she gasped. Beast Boy was beating on the door, yelling something that only came through to her as metallic echoes. Her face evened out and she nervously fumbled for the communicator she had in her pocket. Robin had told her to call if Beast Boy started to freak out.

"Robin?" Starfire opened the link and waited for Robin's face to appear. In less than a second, as if he had been expecting the call, Robin's face appeared on the tiny screen.

"What is it, Star?" He asked. She could see by the way that everything behind him was blurring that he was already on the move, coming to see what was up.

"It is Beast Boy," Starfire told him, "he is doing the… 'freaking out', and it would be most wise for you to get over her as quickly as possible." The girl suddenly shrieked in surprise as the door behind her gave a great metal groan and bent outward.

"I'm already on my way," Robin said, and moved to end the transmission.

"Robin?" Starfire asked suddenly. Robin's eyes met hers and Starfire nervously glanced over her shoulder. "Did Raven tell you what it is that is wrong with Beast Boy? Did she tell you what it is she saw within him?" Beast Boy's screams continued firing through the door.

"Yes," Robin said, nodding slowly, "she did." And then the screen went black, and the pounding and screaming ended.


	9. Taken Away

Chapter nine is here just for you. I hope people don't get confused, I noticed that I tend to jump around in time a lot, but I try and keep it fairly orderly. Anyway, I know it's been slow building for awhile now, but here's where it takes a turn and things start getting faster.

Chapter nine. Enjoy.

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"Raven, could I have a word with you?" Raven had just been of the verge of asking Beast Boy the questions she had been wanting to ask for what seemed like an eternity when Robin had entered and posed his question.

"Uh, yeah," she said, turning away from Beast Boy to look at Robin. What horrible timing he has. He seemed to be fidgeting nervously, which she found to be quite strange. His eyes kept darting to Beast Boy and then back to her. Suddenly there came to her a most terrible thought. Had Cyborg discovered something in BB's blood tests? Was that why Robin looked so nervous? Raven's heart felt on the verge of tearing from her chest.

"Rae?" The voice that spoke her name was so quiet that Raven wasn't sure she had actually heard it. It sounded almost pathetic. She turned back to the green skinned Titan and he looked up at her meekly. "You'll come back soon, right?" She hesitated before answering. Something about the way Robin was looking at her made her think she might be gone awhile.

"I…" Her gaze had wandered to the floor before she realized it and she could feel tears trying to break away from her eyes. She looked up after a moment and smiled. She wasn't going to look scared. She was going to be strong for Beast Boy and not jump to horrible conclusions. "Of course I will, Beast Boy," she said, rubbing her hand soothingly across his arm. She turned and followed Robin out, dimming the lights just before she exited.

Alone now. Empty rooms were so much more terrifying than filled ones. It was too quiet. The silence buzzed in his super sensitive ears and every slight noise caused him to jump. He sucked in a breath and let it out slowly. "I'm being silly," he said. It was silent again. He had almost expected someone to answer back.

After about ten minutes he was sure Raven wouldn't be back any time soon. He wanted to be mad at her, but found that he couldn't. Exasperated, he slid down the surprisingly comfortable hospital bed and pulled the sheets up over his head. Everything around him smelled ultra clean and unnatural. He decided that he wouldn't be able to fall asleep, but before he knew it he had slipped into a land of dreams.

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"Why are you locking the door?" Raven watched confused as Robin pulled a key from his pocket and inserted into the handle of the door that led into the infirmary.

"Starfire?" He said suddenly and without answering Raven's question.

"Yes, Robin?"

Raven hadn't even noticed the alien girl was standing there until she spoke. She had been sitting in a chair as if she had been waiting for them.

"I want you to stay here until I come get you." Robin started to walk away and motioned for Raven to follow him. He continued to talk to Starfire as he walked. "No matter what happens, don't let Beast Boy out, and call me if anything is up." Starfire looked distraught at perhaps having to deny Beast Boy exit from the room, but did as she was asked, nodding to show she understood her task.

"Robin," Raven said, sounding quite annoyed at being ignored by the Titan's leader. "What's going on?"

"I want to show you something," he said, voice suddenly filled with a mix of concern, sadness, and what Raven perceived as a hint of fear.

"What is it?" Raven's voice was now one of complete concern and she instantly forgave Robin's previous rudeness. "It's the tests, isn't it?" She asked. "What's wrong? What does Beast Boy have?" Robin's face held nothing but confusion.

"No," Robin said, still leading Raven. "I think Cyborg is still working on those. What I need to show you is on the t.v."

"Jesus Christ!" Raven suddenly felt an immense anger toward Robin. "I thought there was something incredibly wrong and you just want to show me something on t.v.?" She felt like striking the Boy Wonder.

"There is something incredibly wrong," Robin said, and Raven feared she had spoken too soon.

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Cyborg wiped his brow of the perspiration that had gathered there and then went immediately back to the task at hand. He stood, hunched over an elaborate computer system, his fingers skating over the various keys around him, all of them alight with color. Behind him, the vast chamber of his metal room stretched on, filled to the brim with technological equipment, and echoing with beeps and clicks.

Very gently, his metal fingers held the vials of blood he had drawn from Beast Boy's arm and inserted them into a spot on the panel in front of him. A hiss noise was heard and the warm liquid slowly seeped from the pair of matching vials and was drunk up by the thirsty computer. He cracked his neck while waiting for all the blood to drain, easing some of the tension that had built up into his neck, and then set to work.

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Raven watched the television patiently as the news story unfolded in front of her. It scared her, yes, this was true, but it also seemed to fit. It made some amount of sense, and she accepted it.

"I should have stopped him from leaving," she said when the story had ended, referring to earlier when Beast Boy had stormed out of her room. "I knew something like this would happen." Robin shook his head sadly.

"Don't you dare blame yourself," he told her, "the fault here does not lay with you." Raven sighed and nodded.

"You're going to make me tell you, right?" It was unavoidable, and the demon knew it.

"You have to, Raven," Robin said, "it's important. I need to know what's going on for the safety of my team and for the safety of the city." She nodded again, but said nothing. Somewhere in the room around them a clock ticked out every second in a painfully loud electronic click. Raven could hear her leader's even and steady breaths, but she could also hear his heart, and it sounded as if it were trying to break itself free of his chest.

"I guess I should start from the beginning," she said softly, and that's exactly what she did. She told the story of how she had discovered Beast Boy the night before, and how he had been incredibly intoxicated. She told of how the two had talked and how Beast Boy had explained that there wasn't something right about him, something that scared him and struggled to break free. The Beast, Raven told Robin, or something like it.

"Do you mean that thing that Beast Boy turned into for awhile when he got covered in chemicals?" Robin asked. Raven replied in the affirmative. "I thought that it hadn't been any trouble since then?"

"No, it hadn't," Raven told him, "until now. It seems like it's trying to break free, at least that's what Beast Boy says. That's why he was drinking, he believes alcohol is the only thing keeping it down."

"But why is that such a problem?" Robin was confused. "It wasn't incredibly hard to deal with before."

"And that brings us to the next point in my story," Raven said. "The Beast before and The Beast now are different. The former Beast was, for the most part, good, he saved me, remember?" Robin nodded. "This Beast… this is different. This Beast wants nothing but death, destruction, and chaos. Whatever it is thinking floats up to Beast Boy and makes him see these things, forces them upon him. And what I saw in his head, the thing that I hesitated to speak because it scared me so bad, was the incredibly horrible and extremely graphic deaths of you and I and all the other Titans at the hands of Beast Boy himself."

Suddenly Robin's communicator sparked to life and he knew instantly that it was Starfire trying to contact him. He set off toward the infirmary now determined to stop Beast Boy using all means necessary.

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In Cyborg's lab his computer screen flashed data at an incredible speed. All the tests were coming back negative and the metal teen was in a bright mood. The only thing he felt worried about was the aids test, for which they would have to continually test Beast Boy for at least another eight months.

-----

Robin wasn't even halfway to the infirmary and already he could hear Beast Boy's furious knocking and screaming to be let out. The green Titan was practically family to the Boy Wonder, but he would die before letting Beast Boy harm anyone else.

-----

Without warning the screen above him flashed and Cyborg's speedy typing stopped. He stared up at the monitor confusedly. The words "Anomaly Detected" scrolled across the screen.

-----

Starfire came into view as Robin neared the infirmary door, which had literally buckled outward under Beast Boy's rage. The alien girl's face was a mixture of fear and concern. She opened her mouth to speak, but no words were allowed to leave before the hallway they were in was racked with and incredible explosion that sent them both to the ground.

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Cyborg's fingers wandered in a seemingly random pattern across the keys in front of him. He pushed a final button and studied the screen above him, the results of his ministrations flashing across its surface.

"What the…?" His confused question caught in his throat as a far off explosion shook his room and sent some of his smaller gadgets off their shelves and onto the floor.

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Beast Boy's knuckles had bloodied and his hands ached beyond anything he thought possible. His voice had gone hoarse and his throat stung, begging him to stop his shouting.

"Let… Me… Out," he cried, breathlessly. He looked down at the communicator he had in his hand and saw that the screen had gone black. Jinx had left him. For some reason he wished she were back, he would rather her be here than be completely alone. And trapped.

The entire wall farthest from Beast Boy suddenly exploded, sending him flying ten feet across the room and landing with a sickening thud in a heap. His instincts as a Titan took over and he was on his feet instantly. He yelped in pain as he stood, a terrible burning ache ripping across his side.

The thick grey smoke that hung in the air began to clear and the dust began to settle. A slim figure appeared among the debris and took a step forward. Jinx emerged from the shadows in a flourish of whipping wind that tore through the hole she and the other members of the Hive had created in the side of Titans Tower.

"Jinx." Beast Boy hissed, narrowing his eyes.

"Who did you expect?" She asked evilly, "Santa Claus?"

"What the hell are you doing here?" Beast Boy took up a fighting stance, wincing at the pain that twisted through him.

"I'm here to break you free," she said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Hurry up and follow!" Over her shoulder the green Titan could see the other members of The Hive Five in the cabin of some sort of hovering craft just outside the hole in the wall.

"Why the fuck would I go with you?" He spat. She smirked at him and he didn't like it one bit.

"Because," she said, "you saw what you did to those people and you know that the other Titans aren't going to stand for it. They were the ones that locked you in this room, after all. The next step is locking you in jail." She took a step closer to Beast Boy and he could see the way her eyes glowed a bright purple-pink color. "And besides, I know that you're scared of that thing inside you." Beast Boy's skull ached and swam in a pool of dizziness as jinx brought herself close enough for him to smell her breath, warm with a hint of mint. "And Slade says he knows how to cure you."

Behind them the door to the infirmary began to be forced open. It had been bent into an unnatural shape under Beast Boy's rage and the task of getting it open was a tough one. Jinx grabbed the green Titan's arm and pulled him toward her ship, and Beast Boy didn't object. As he stepped into the ship, holding the hospital gown tight to keep it from flying open, the infirmary room door was saturated in dark energy and pulled away from its frame. The ship began to pull away, and the last thing Beast Boy saw before leaving the Tower for what might have been the last time ever was the wide, shocked, hurt, angry, confused, sad, and incredibly beautiful eyes of Raven.


	10. Inside The Hive

Chapter ten. This is sort of a pointless little chapter that really has only one purpose, which will become quite obvious toward the end. I really like this chapter though, and am proud of myself for updating so fast. Oh, and some of you may start fretting after reading this chapter because of a certain… changing of the tables, let's say. Don't worry, I know what I'm doing.

I love you all, keep the reviews coming, even though I may not always respond to them, I keep every single one of them in my email forever and ever and I know which of you have been good to me.

Here it is, enjoy.

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It wasn't long before the snickering started. Beast Boy stood in front of a small window on the ship that the Hive Five had… rescued him in? Had they really rescued him? In a way, yes, but that didn't seem an accurate description. He stood, looking out over the city at the lights that shined below him, all in shades of yellow and orange, punctuated every so often with the scream of a pink neon light, when all of a sudden, someone let out a giggle.

At first, Beast Boy ignored it. He was among enemies, and had no idea of their ways. But soon there was no way he could block it out. He turned and found Gizmo trying to hold his laughter in.

"What?" Beast Boy asked, annoyed. Gizmo looked around at the other Hive members, who were all smiling as well, and then turned back to Beast Boy.

"Nothing, nothing at all," Gizmo said, "it's just that you have a real nice ass!" With that, Gizmo and the other Hive members fell apart with laughter. Beast Boy blushed and reached back, holding the back of his hospital gown closed.

"This fucking blows," Beast Boy mumbled, and that only made them laugh harder.

"Don't worry, Beast Boy." Jinx was sitting somewhere off to the left from where he had been standing, looking out the window. He looked over to her and saw that she had been the only person on the small ship, besides Beast Boy of course, who had not been laughing. However, her face was sporting a trademark smirk. She stood and walked toward the front of the ship, as she passed him by, she said, "you _do _have a nice ass."

The ship ride was a short one, and they were soon at The Hive's base. Everyone rushed off the ship, glad to be back home. Beast Boy was already starting to miss _his _home. They all had their own rooms to go to, and Beast Boy felt strange and out of place. What was he going to do now that he was here? Was he going to become a member of The Hive? Why exactly did Slade want him here? And when did he get the cure that he was promised?

"You're injured." Jinx stepped out of nowhere and scared the shit out of Beast Boy. He jumped and Jinx smirked again.

"Wh… what?"

"You're injured. I can tell. Follow me."

Beast Boy did as he was asked and followed Jinx deep into the core of The Hive. It was really weird being here. He felt like he was seeing something that he wasn't supposed to. They passed Billy Numerous, then Mammoth, then Gizmo as they walked. Each acted just as they had on the ship, as if Beast Boy was nothing of incredible importance. They acted as if they hadn't been locked in battles many times before.

"I suppose we should get you into some normal clothes," Jinx said. She walked into a room and held the door open for her guest.

"Such a gentleman," he said sarcastically, but not rudely, he might as well not make this situation any more complicated.

"This is Billy's Room," Jinx told him, "I think his clothes will fit you. I'll be back to get you in a few minutes." She smirked again and then disappeared out the door the two had come in through.

"Fantastic," Beast Boy said, "I may or may not have committed multiple murders, I'm being hunted by my former teammates, I'm consorting with my former enemies, and now I have to wear someone else's clothes, could this get any worse?"

Jinx returned several minutes later just as she said she would right as Beast Boy was tying his new shoes. It really wasn't as bad as he thought it would be; Numerous actually had some decent street clothes. Beast Boy had settled on a black t-shirt and some dark blue jeans, and had even found a pair of skater shoes.

"Do you feel pretty?" Jinx asked, standing at the door. Beast Boy shook his head.

"You never feel pretty when you're wearing someone else's underwear." Jinx laughed and so did Beast Boy. Laughter felt good, it felt normal.

"Come on," Jinx said, motioning him back into the hall, "I'll get you fixed up."

"In here," Jinx instructed, waving Beast Boy into a room marked with a red cross a few minutes later. He stepped past her and into The Hive's infirmary. It was nothing like the room he had been occupying in Titan's Tower only an hour ago (had it really only been that long? It seemed like a million years had passed since he had left the comfort of his home). It was quite a bit smaller than the one at Titan's Tower, and much darker, but was not lacking in medical supplies, that was for sure. In fact, some of the machines hidden off in the dark corners of the room almost seemed menacing, as if meant to harm rather than to heal.

Jinx stepped in behind the now former Titan and shut the door behind her. She walked by him and up to an examining table covered in something like parchment paper that sat towards the center of the room. She patted it and looked over at Beast Boy, "hop up," she said, smiling. He nodded and moved toward her, jumping up onto the table, wincing as he landed. His legs swung absentmindedly forward then back, hitting the table with a soft thud.

Beast Boy nervously fidgeted with the hem of the shirt he had been given and the parchment paper that lined the table he was sitting on while Jinx hovered around him. She made him nervous for some reason. It may have been that the two of them had done battle so many times, but Beast Boy felt that it was something else. Maybe it was the way she looked at him, like she was trying to see all of him with those scorching eyes. It felt like she was trying to take him all in and know everything about him, all with her stare.

"Where does it hurt?" Jinx asked, almost in a whisper, from somewhere over Beast Boy's shoulder. He had almost jumped at the sound of her voice.

"My side," he said, reaching across his body toward his left side with his right hand, placing it on his ribs. Smaller hands than his were suddenly at the hem of his shirt, pulling it up gently. He raised his arms and let the garment be slid off of his body. Jinx stepped around to stand in front of him, placing his shirt on the table beside him. She leaned forward and studied the skin over his left ribs.

"The skin in this area looks bruised," she said, nodding as if she had expected it. Beast Boy looked down toward the area and indeed, a bruise, black on his skin, had spread across the area he had fallen on during his escape. "Be prepared for some pain," she said, happily, as if she had just told him to have a nice day. She looked up and smirked at the look of worry that crossed Beast Boy's green face. "Don't worry," she said, "I'll be gentle." He mumbled something and Jinx took it as a sign to continue.

Two thin fingers crept slowly toward dark green skin. They landed softly, eliciting a small hiss of pain. Jinx's fingers were cold and hot and tingly all at once. They probed gently, running along his side, sending a shiver down his back. Jinx felt the shiver and smiled, not looking up at her patient. Her entire hand joined her fingers, and she smoothed them up higher, feeling for anything broken.

Beast Boy would wince every so often as Jinx pushed a little harder in certain areas, but she had been true to her word and was being incredibly gentle. After a while of probing and Beast Boy's shivering, her fingers stopped moving. Her hand felt heavy and warm on his side. She tilted her head up and met his eyes. It wasn't as hard to meet her stare as it was to meet Raven's. There was a buzz between them and Beast Boy found that he wasn't able to look away.

"I… think… um…" Jinx shook her head and then seemed to find her voice. "I doubt any ribs are broken," she said, "but some of them are most likely bruised."

"Alright," Beast Boy said, smiling gently at the bad luck witch. He was a bit wary of her intentions at first, but she seemed genuinely concerned for him and he was grateful. "What's the remedy?" He asked. He was finding that it was getting easier to talk to Jinx, at least much easier than with the other member of The Hive.

"I'm going to bind your ribs," she said, opening a supply drawer that slid out from the table Beast Boy was sitting on and retrieving some supplies.

"I though they didn't do that anymore," he told her, and she nodded.

"Not for broken ribs, no, it doesn't really do anything," she said, "but since yours are only bruised, the pressure from the binding will help with the pain, I don't have any painkillers to give you." She uncoiled a long line of what looked like thick gauze and sliced off a piece with a pair of medical scissors. "Lift 'em up," she said, and Beast Boy raised his arms in compliance, placing his hands on top of his head. "Uh, sorry if it smells," Beast Boy chuckled slightly, "it's been awhile since I've had a shower."

"I live with all boys," Jinx said, "and I assure you that you smell better than all of them combined." Jinx paused for a moment, perhaps realizing that she had, in some small way, paid him the second compliment of the day, no matter how small or strange, and then set to work.

She carefully placed the beginning of the bandage on the skin at the center of his chest and then wrapped it around to his back. She reached around him, as if giving him a hug, and grabbed the bandage with her other hand, bringing it back around to his front. She repeated this several time, and whenever she leaned forward to grab the other end of the bandage behind him, Beast Boy's nose would catch a stray breeze of her scent. It was incredible and unique. She smelled of jasmine, with a hint of something peppery like patchouli.

Jinx looked up at Beast Boy and saw him smiling goofily down at her while she worked. He looked like he was caught in the middle of a day dream. "What?" She asked, blushing slightly and looking away.

"Nothing," he said softly, slowly, sexily. Jinx went back to work and within a moment she had Beast Boy wrapped from the bottom of his ribs and up about six inches.

"Are you ready?" She asked out of nowhere, and BB looked at her confusedly.

"For…?" He asked. Jinx smirked.

"This." The bad luck witch yanked hard on the bandages, and Beast Boy gritted his teeth, grunting in pain. "Sorry about that," she told him, fastening the end of the bandage with metal clasps. "The bandages have to be tight." Beast Boy let out a pained breath slowly. "Walk around, try 'em out," she said.

Beast Boy pushed himself off the table and landed on the hard cement floor, expecting the shock to go up his body and elicit pain from his ribs, but to his surprise, their was hardly any at all. The bandages wrapped around him kept the pain at a minimum, and he only felt a dull ache every so often.

"It's perfect," he said, stepping up to Jinx. She smiled at him and he smiled back. He could hear her breathing in then out, in then out, in then out. It seemed they were getting slowly closer, pulled together by some magnetic force. Beast Boy could feel the warmth of her body falling into his own. "Thanks a lot, Jinx," he said. She smiled softly and, like all the times before, it was closer to a smirk.

She began to reach her hand, the same one that had gently probed his side, up his body. He looked down at it, watching as it slowly, very slowly, so slowly, stopped over his chest. He looked back up to her face and didn't even see the thing that happened next coming. Jinx's hand shot forward and tweaked his nipple. Hard. He yelped and jumped back and his ribs gave a powerful throb of pain, which caused him to yelp again.

"What the fuck!" He yelled. Jinx was laughing so hard that she had to steady herself against the same table she had wrapped Beast Boy's ribs on. For some reason, her laughter made Beast Boy laugh, even though his nipple and ribs hurt. What she had done had been so childish, especially in such a serious moment. It had been weird, silly, unexpected, in fewer words, it had been Beast Boy. That's something he would have done to Robin or Aqualad or Speedy if one of them had started getting all mushy and thanking Beast Boy for something he had done. (Cyborg and Raven and Starfire were all immune to this particular joke for obvious reasons. Cyborg had no nipples, and if Beast Boy had tried it on one of the girls, he would be dead before he hit the ground).

"I'm sorry, Beast Boy," she said, wiping a tear from her eye, "but I had to do it." She grabbed his shirt from off the table and threw it to him, "put your shirt on."


	11. That's a Surprise

This here is sort of another filler chapter. I'm really sorry, but it is necessary for later. That's not to say it's bad. There's some interesting stuff down there. Some REAL interesting stuff toward the end. And I made up a name for Kid Wykkyd if it makes you feel better.

Chapter 11. Enjoy.

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Disgusting sounds of mushy slop made their way into Beast Boy's revolted ears. Food flew through the air, landing like excrement in piles of multicolored bile. Eyes wide, Beast Boy looked across the table from where he sat at the other members of The Hive. Mammoth had three plates in front of him, each piled higher than his head with many different kinds of food. He had apparently decided that utensils were useless, and was instead using his hands. Gizmo was spearing food with all of his robotic spider legs and sending it straight to his mouth.

A strange metallic sound drew Beast Boy's attention to Gizmo's left. He found Kid Wykkyd looking around skeptically at the other Hive members while secretly transporting food into his cape where it disappeared in a shock of his own brand of magic. Saving it for later perhaps? Next to him, See-More and Billy Numerous were fighting over a plate of spaghetti, and its tomato sauce topping was spraying like fresh blood across the table, most of it landing on Mammoth, who didn't seem to care.

It seemed the only one who was showing any kind of civility at all was Jinx, who sat next to Beast Boy munching on a salad, staring over Gizmo's shoulder, lost in thought. Every so often Beast Boy swore he could see her glancing at him, but when he turned she was looking away.

If there was something on the table that hadn't been tainted by meat, the former Titan had yet to see it. His spirits had picked up when they had all first sat down to eat (apparently something they did every night together, which seemed sort of out of place for an evil brotherhood). He had spotted a bowl of macaroni and cheese, and although none of the ingredients found in the cheese were identifiable by man, it contained no meat and was, of course, delicious. His spirits were quickly dashed when Mammoth picked up the bowl and downed it in under a second. He smiled over the bowl at Beast Boy, and instantly the changeling knew the bastard had done it on purpose.

"I, um, can't really eat any of this." All eyes were on Beast Boy.

"Why the hell not?" See-More asked from across the table where it looked like he had surrendered the spaghetti to Billy. His voice held no anger, it seemed he was just curious.

"I don't really eat meat," Beast Boy said. Mammoth's mouth dropped open.

"Are you gay or something?" Mammoth asked.

"Hey now," Billy said, glaring across the table, "watch your tongue, Mammoth, or I might have to cut it out."

"Alright, alright," Mammoth said, waving Billy off. "You really don't eat meat?" He asked, sounding like he didn't believe it. Beast Boy nodded.

"Here you go, Beast Boy," Jinx said, passing him her salad. She had taken only several bites from it and it remained mostly intact. She reached across the table and pulled a plate of lasagna toward herself.

"Um, thank you."

The next couple hours were mostly boring. At one point Gizmo and Billy had started fighting and that had entertained Beast Boy for awhile. The t.v. was on for awhile and then off. Billy Numerous and Kid Wykkyd disappeared for awhile and then reappeared, and then another fight broke out between the same contenders as before. The t.v. went on again for awhile, and around that time people started heading off toward their own rooms. Beast Boy was starting to wonder if he would have to wait until tomorrow for Slade to show up.

"Bored?" Jinx asked, stepping from out of nowhere.

"A little," Beast Boy told her.

"I guess everyone's just a bit tired," she said, "it was a big day today." She looked like she had said something wrong for a moment before it passed.

"Big day?" The former Titan asked. Jinx ignored it.

"Well then, what do you want to do?" Jinx asked. Beast Boy thought for a moment. It had been a while since he had had a drink, and Slade had yet to give him the cure he had promised. He didn't feel The Beast stirring at the moment, but he would be damned if he was going to let it surprise him like it had last time and make him hurt anyone again.

"Got any alcohol?"

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Yes. Yes they did have alcohol, and they had a whole lot. When Jinx told him that they did and led him into the kitchen, Beast Boy expected a case of beer or maybe a bottle of whiskey or something. He had not expected The Hive Five's leader to lead him to a cabinet filled with every kind of liquor known to man. When she pulled those doors open, the bottles seemed to give off a magical glow and Beast Boy could swear he heard a choir of angels sing.

The two of them, Beast Boy and Jinx, had been drinking for the last hour, and there was no denying that they were both pretty drunk.

"You guys got any video games here?" Beast Boy asked, his words running together. He took a shot of vodka and scrunched up his face at the way it burned a path down his throat. The two were crouched at the coffee table across from each other in The Hive's common room.

"Yeah, yeah, we, yeah, we got some video games." Jinx giggled at her inability to put together a sentence. "I'd let you play them but Billy took them into his room and, you know, it's after, you know, um, eleven and I think him and Wykkyd are, you know…" Beast Boy stared at her and shook his head slowly in confusion.

"No," he said, "I have no idea what you're talking about, Jinxie." She smiled at the nickname he had given her, and looked like she was trying to figure out a way to better explain herself.

"Um… you know how, uh, Billy got mad when Mammoth called you gay at dinner?" Beast Boy nodded after he took another shot and Jinx continued. "Well, Billy and John, that's Wykkyd's real name if you didn't know, they're, um, sort of, uh…"

"They're what?" Beast Boy asked. Jinx took a breath and then another shot.

"Billy and John are," she said, "together. You know what I mean?"

"As… as in a couple?" Beast Boy's eyes were wide with amusement. Jinx nodded, and the former Titan fell over laughing, spilling the shot he had poured all across the table.

"Hey!" Jinx stood up, nearly falling over in her inebriated state. She looked mad. "They've gotten a lot of shit for it and I'm not gonna let you give them shit too."

"I'm… I'm sorry," Beast Boy said, trying not to laugh anymore. "I don't care that they're gay at all, I swear, it's just, come on! It's so unexpected!" Jinx's face brightened slightly and she no longer looked angry.

"So you're not going to bother them about it?" She had crossed over to Beast Boy's side of the table and now sat kneeling in front of him. He shook his head. "Good," she said. Beast Boy looked as though he were about to say something, but stopped himself, holding in a giggle. Jinx lay down on the floor and Beast Boy did as well. Their legs were pointed in opposite directions, and their heads were right next to each other.

"How long have they, um, been together?" Beast Boy asked. Jinx turned her head toward Beast Boy, and he turned his head toward her.

"I think about five months," she told him. Her breath smelled like the alcohol she had been consuming. Earlier she had let her hair down and it curled around her pale cheeks.

"So, you think they're, um, doing… it… right now?"

"Probably." Jinx closed her eyes for a moment and then opened them slowly. She was probably tired. So was Beast Boy. "They do it every night," she said, smiling, "and it's loud." Beast Boy laughed. It was weird. Kid Wykkyd and Billy Numerous together? That must have been one hell of an interesting relationship. The more he thought about it, and the more time he spent time here, he realized how similar the Hive and the Titans were. They ate together, lived together, dated one another, and seemed to care for one another.

Beast Boy yawned and stretched his arms. It was pretty late, and his day had been exhausting. "Tired?" Jinx asked. He nodded and she pushed herself up, stretching like he had. "Come on," she said. "I'll show you to your room." The two of them stood up, swaying dangerously.

"What's the plan for tomorrow?" Beast Boy asked as Jinx led him to his room. He was still a bit confused about this whole situation, but he was too tired to really sweat the details.

"Slade will be here later in the day," Jinx told him. She saw the worried look that passed over Beast Boy's face and smiled. "Don't worry, I'll be there." They stopped outside of a door that looked like all the others. Behind this door was the room that Beast Boy would be staying in for who knows how long. "Here it is."

Beast Boy opened the door and stepped in. The room was bare save for a bed and a desk on the far wall. There was a large window behind the desk, but all he could see was ocean. He had no idea where he was on the map.

"How does it suit you?" Jinx asked from behind him. He hadn't realized she had stepped in behind him. She swayed slightly where she stood.

"It's fine," he told her, "it has everything I need." He sat on the edge of the bed and felt the mattress sag as Jinx got on as well. He was facing away from her when he felt her hands on his shoulders. She was kneeling behind him and massaging his back affectionately. He had tensed at first, but relaxed into her touch.

"Beast Boy?" She said. He had closed his eyes and the sound of his name drew his left lid up slightly.

"Yes, Jinx?"

"I just wanted to tell you that I'm glad you're here." Her hands stopped their movements and Beast Boy turned his head toward her where she sat kneeling behind him. "It's not easy being the only girl here in The Hive. And sometimes I get kind of bored. Billy and Kid Wykkyd are always together, and Mammoth and Gizmo are always playing video games. See-More is usually willing to do something with me, but he gets kind of creepy sometimes. I know you have a lot going on right now, but I want you to know that I'll always be there for you if you need me." Beast Boy was sort of shocked. Where had that come from?"

"Thank you." He really didn't know what else to say. How do you reply to that? "I… if you ever need me," he said, "I'll be here for you too." It sounded sort of dumb, but it would work.

Jinx's eyes found Beast Boy's. They were incredibly dark and deep. His shoulders felt warm beneath her fingers. She reveled in the feel of the muscles under his skin and couldn't get herself to remove her hands. Beast Boy's tongue snuck out from between his lips and licked around his mouth, wetting his dry lips. He leaned back into her farther and Jinx found herself bending down toward his face.

Their lips met in an explosion of heat and passion. Jinx could taste the alcohol in Beast Boy's mouth and for a moment she though that this might have been a bad idea. The thought didn't last as Beast Boy reached his hand back and placed it behind her head, tangling it into her hair. One of her hands went down his chest and just as she slipped her tongue into his mouth she pushed her hand up under his shirt. Her fingers tickled around his stomach, playing with the wispy curls of hair around his navel. Her lips left his and latched onto his neck, covering it with points of pure heat, making Beast Boy moan and squirm. Her fingers on his stomach crept curiously lower, stopping at the waste band of his boxers which rode up a few inches higher than his pants. She stopped there a moment, wondering if she should go farther. A whimper from Beast Boy made her smile and let her know she could go on. Her fingers crept under the waste band and tangled in the thick curls hidden there.

"Raven…" Beast Boy's eyes went wide and he slapped his hands over his mouth. Jinx froze and both remained motionless for hours and days and weeks and months and years. She pulled away from him slowly and he turned, his insides shredding at the look of hurt on her face. She raised her hand and slapped him across the face. His cheek stung and his heart fell. Jinx's eyes filled with water and she ran from the room, trying to hold in her tears.


End file.
